I’ll be honest with you. I’ve tried to write this post probably five times and I’ve never found the right words.
I’ve been planning this blog post for weeks knowing that today would come even though I hoped it wouldn’t.
It was six years ago today that my sweet Cora died.
Cora and Anna, my twin girls, were only four and a half months old when Cora died of SIDS.
Everything about that sentence makes me cry.
Anna lost her sister. They were mere babies and SIDS gives us no answers, not at all.
I’ve thought about writing about what happened that day, the pain of holding my dead daughter in my arms for hours, the sorrow of coming home without her.
I’ve thought about talking about what we did today and how we honor Cora.
But none of it is right. None of it is wrong either.
I just know it hurts.
Every year that comes, the day is different.
I think in some ways its harder now as her twin sister Anna grows older and begins to ask and understand more about her sister.
Today I told her that it was the day her sister died, went to heaven and became an angel.
She cried for a minute but didn’t understand. So then she talked about dying herself, something I couldn’t stand her talking about.
We put pennies into our Cora box to give her hugs and kisses.
The shining light of the day is the friends who have remembered and reached out to offer me hugs, phone calls and smiles. Even six years later, they still remember that day.
Some were there and some were quick to rush to my side as soon as they could to be there. And six years later, they’re still here.
It gives me the peace of mind knowing that my sweet baby Cora has not been forgotten. She will be remembered and loved in the hearts of many.